What makes people want to change? Notice that we didn't say, "think they should change." 

There are many things that make people think they should change, and all of them add up to pressure from outside themselves. It may be disapproval from a family member or friend. It may be social or cultural norms or even prohibition. It may be fear of punishment or humiliation. 

But when pressure to change is coming from the outside world, our desire to change is probably going to disappear as soon as the pressure is removed. The results of our change efforts are not very likely to last. What makes people really want to change is pressure coming from inside. Most important is the desire to move toward greater experiences of pleasure.

Next comes the knowledge that if we don't change, we will be violating our own standards, failing to live like the person we know ourselves to be. It also helps if we realize that the results of not changing will be far more painful than any discomfort we may create for ourselves if we do change. A technique that's really useful when it comes to creating positive and lasting change is to use the power of your imagination.

Create vivid mental pictures linking pleasure and rewards to the behavior you want and pain and discomfort to the behavior you want to get rid of. Play these "mental movies" for yourself several times a day, every day. If you really focus your attention on them, you'll be creating new associations in your brain, associations that will make it much easier for you to change your behavior in a lasting, positive way.