I've experienced many students who tend to blame others for not being prepared and/or not completing assignments.
I usually speak with these students as soon as the excuses start coming. I explain to them that although there will always be outside forces in our lives, ultimately those forces don't change our responsibility. I use the 'dog ate my homework' as an example. I tell the student that the dog eating his/her assignment does not negate the fact that the assignment is still due and there are consequenses for not having it turned in. Then I ask, what could you have done to prevent this? Ususally I get no response to this question, or an 'I don't know'. I then suggest keeping the dog away from the homework (put him outside), go into a room where the dog isn't allowed, put your homework in a secure place once finished so the dog can't get to it, etc.
By doing this, I try to show students that they are in control of the situation and have to take responsibility.
I relate their stories to real life/job scenarios and if the story would hold water
This is a difficult one to deal with but I propose the idea that no individual has control over our emotions, accomplishments, etc. I relay to the student that people can at most have an influence on us but can not force us to feel a certain way, fail a test, react, etc.The control really resides with the individual and he must exhibit that in all of his/her dealings.
Hi Joe,
Sometimes is is just absolutely necessary to have a one-on-one serious conversation, but this method gives you an alternative.
Patricia
Hi Victoria,
You certainly want to deal with these students in a private setting. Help them to see how they are responsible.
Patricia
Love it! I think its more effective than having to have that one to one, "serious," conversation. I will try it.
Tought question. I wish I were more creative w this one (i.e. I need more tools in my toolbox for this area to be honest); but, I typically speak to them in a one to one atmosphere and encourage them with a few points about responsibility. I typically share with them the breakthrough I had in my professional life (while in college) when I learned that avoiding respnsibility is one of the key factors that hold people back in life. A Life Coach typically spends the first hour or two hours in their coaching session on this topic alone; they say its the key to all personal growth because with out it we give our "power" (inertia) away to somoene else.
Not sure what else to do, I wish I had some assignment or activity they could do before I give my mini "lecture." I know hands on is always more instructional in this sense for self reflection. Maybe ask them if they would be willing to volunteer for a child care facility. They may give a quick dose of reality!! :)
Hi Angelia,
I do not know of a trick, but we have to continue to talk and point out to them when appropriate that it is really their fault.
Patricia
Hi Celesta,
I like your approach to this, and I especially like how you do it from the very beginning. Students must learn it is not all about pointing the finger at others.
Patricia
I think those students are ones that need to be taken aside after class and talked to. It would be inconsiderate to the other students to waste learning time to address attitude problems with a particular student. Sometimes a little rationale with a touch of compassion can work through their problems of pointing fingers.
At the start of each class I like to stress from day one how important being accountable for your own actions, successes and failures is. It sets the tone for the class, and really helps students understand that "passing the buck" when the fail to do what is expected of the them is just not acceptable.
Yes it is true that everyone is responsible for their own actions. But how do we get the students to do this? What is the trick?
Hi Robert,
Students must take a sense of responsibility for their education so that they can become successful. As educators we wil encourage, help and guide them as much as possible, but the ultimate responsibility is solely left up to them.
Patricia
I teach Psycholog and Sociology and I am a Mental Health Therapist. So I get this a lot. I try to redirect and rephrase statements. If you allow them to start challenging themselves they will be less likely to blame others and take self-responsiblity.
I remind students that you can delegate authority but you cannot delegate responsibility. I may be the authority in the classroom but that they are responsible for their education. I cannot, and will not, assume responsibility for their success. I simply lay out the ground work. It is up to them whether they will be successful or not. I offer encouragement and advise when needed. I try to help them see how only they can be responsible for their success.
Hi Douglas,
I am a firm believer in giving my students reminders so that they can not shift the blame. It will be their own fault, if they do not produce.
Patricia
I think that haveing a reflexive discussion with the student can help them to verbalize some of the stress or challenges that they may be facing. I think that it is also very important to continue to verbalize the requirements often such as deadlines and upcoming scheduled events.
I really liked the idea of the initial quiz and the one minute writing. It shows accountability.
"What is expected is what is inspected"
I try to explain to all students that they are no longer in high school , and they have many responsibilities they need to fulfill. On the other hand, I do understand when things are beyond their control. I give the benefit of the doubt, but will not be taken advantage of.
Hi Tanya,
Absolutely! We are here to talk about you and not everyone else is what I tell these type of students.
Patricia
Remind the student, that this is there education, and about them, not other students.
