I use a lot of observation and that gives me first hand information. And then I listen, it helps in confirming what I have observed. Then, I talk to the individual to prepare for the coaching process. I believe the most important communication skill is listening because I hear both the verbal and non-verbal signs.
I completely agree. What type of asking questions do you feel work the best?
Ryan
Leading by asking questions is a good coaching technique. Good listening skills are vital.
Yes,yes, yes! Great point Stephanie & one that is way too often overlooked. It is so important to listen first & always approach a conversation from the standpoint that there are different viewpoints & methods & we need to be understanding of those differences.
Ryan
I can say, that I learned so far that just because I have done or worked out a problem, does not mean the other person will do it the same way. That is where I get frustrated because I think they aren't listening or arrogant. But that may not be the case at all. They may have a different learning style. I believe the best communication skills is to listen first, and then relay back to the person what you "think" they are saying. This will enable them to either correct you or agree with you.
Absolutely. And the listening needed is deep, what we call level 2 listening. Listening so that you truly hear the concerns, passions, etc behind the words.
Ryan
I believe listening skills are critical to the coaching process. It is important to understand where a coachee is at in terms of understanding the issue in order to improve performance. Listening to the coachee's assessment is critical to understand the coachee's understanding of the situation.
Richard,
Great ideas. Recently I was in a workshop & the facilitator encouraged us to always go back (in these situations) to talking about the impact of behavior. Stating what you observed (as you said)& asking the employee what they think the impact of their behavior was & is this the impact they want. This helps avoid blame & having a conversation about impact.
Ryan
1st you need to make sure you have your caoching hat on straight and you are objective about and have confirmed the alleged issue. Do not blind side the caochee, explain what you have observed and ask for the reasoning and intentions behind what you observed. Turn on your listening mode asking enough open ended question to get the complete picture but not to dominate the conversation or turn it into an interrogation.
Listening sprinkled with open ended questions would be your best skills.
Great ideas Rachel! I especially like your comment regarding preparing the coachee for the coaching session. I'm afraid too often managers "spring" a coaching session on the coachee & then it feels more like a "gotcha" situation or a reprimand rather than an attempt to help someone improve their performance even more. Thanks,
Ryan
In preparing and leading the coaching process with an employee, the coach must be open with the employee and keep the lines of communication open. The coach must prepare the coachee for the coaching session, provide feedback, and schedule a time for follow up. Throughout this process, the coach must actively listen to the coachee. Communication is key here.
Judy,
I apologize for the delayed response, I was out sick the last few days.
Great insight. I completely agree with the need to get to know coachees as individuals & also helping them to come up with answers & create ownership. Keep it up!
Ryan
Before I start to coach someone I get to know the person: likes, dislikes, hobbies, family, ect. I try to find commonality and then persue a trusting relationship. I discuss coaching with him/her to get approval and then proceed. I informally observe to gain insight on weaknesses in performance. We then conference in a very relaxed setting, and agree on what needs work. I offer suggestions after asking open-ended questions. For example one suggestion may be the " I do--We do--You do " method. That is, I model behaviors while the coachee observes me. We conference with feedback. We plan a presentation and proceed to do it together. We conference with more feedback. The coachee goes it alone. I observe, yes more feedback. If I feel the coachee has improved I inform him/her that I'll be back in a few weeks or to get in touch with me if there's a problem or question.
I believe is most important communication skill in coaching asking questions that lead the coachee in the right direction. Having them come up with the answers to their problems creates ownership and maximizes learning.
Absolutely! Great response Michael, especially your point about actively listening to the other person. I would build on what you said regarding the building of trust in that it also allows you as the leader/coach to truly hear the concerns of the other person. Great job.
Ryan
In preparing; gain understanding, observe behavior, question and listen actively
In leading; allow ample time to meet, meet in comfortable setting, use open ended questions to share information, use closed questions to focus, agree on actions, discuss how actions will be measured, and follow up
I believe the most important communication skill is active listening as it helps build trust and the speaker feels you sincerely care about what is being said.
Yes, listening is so key to the coaching conversation. Not only does it assist in getting more information or facts, but it also helps you to hear where the other person really has concerns, fears, etc. By listening we also demonstrate our concern for the other person & this helps them to trust us more.
Good work.
Ryan
The process I follow it to research and get all the necessary facts to address with the coachee. The most important skill is listening. If you listen you will get more information and get to the real nitty gritty of the problem.
Great points. I had an interesting conversation with a leader regarding this today. The point was made that sometimes the individuals we are talking to simply repeat as their goals what they've always been told: i.e. I want to be in a supervisory position. Yet often we can help them the most by getting clear as to whether they actually desire this, or feel this is the expectation for them.
Great job,
Ryan
Initially, I tend to lead the session with trying to discover the direction the individual is aiming, in order to better help determine what they really want and need out of the process. Going for the Supervisory position may increase pay, but if there is an underlying desire to specialize somewhere else or learn some other new skills, I try to help the employee focus their goals so we can develop a program best suited for them.
The most important communication skill in the coaching process as well as every other time is listening. In order to effectively help the coachee achieve their goals or develop their new skill, a manager needs to distill information from their sessions, that the coachee may not realize (personal habits or weaknesses that need to be addressed lest they impede growth, for example). Also, the intentions of the person being coached may not lie in the path they have vocalized. Sometimes a little help focussing on the desired outcome instead of the first obvious step, can lead to a better path for the employee.
Great steps you've outlined here.
I would also add for preparation the importance of making sure you are in the right frame of mind. If you're running from a meeting or have just come from putting out a fire, it may not be the best time for you to have this conversation.
In regards to action steps, I also find it very helpful for both parties to repeat what they believe are the next steps & the agreed upon action, this way you can ensure clarity.
Ryan
