Confrontational Students
tudent who had several drug offenses and then a thefe from motor vehicle charge. In all cases, he managed to get away without jail time. It gave him a sense of authority in that he felt that he could do whatever he wanted whenever he wanted to do it.
No matter how I listened to him or tried to tell him that this was not the way things would go forever, he just assumed s smug, silly smole signifying that he was right no atter what.
Eventually, at the Program Director's suggestion, I began giving him things to do whenever he tried to disrupt the class as if he volunteered. He began to act a little more civilized.
Then he was evicted from his trailer and he left the school. We have no idea where he is today.
Hi Bonnie,
I have witnessed that some educators are truly just kind in nature. It sounds like you are a very kind instructor, but it also sounds like you know when to put your foot down, which is important as well.
Patricia
I want to take this opportunity to convey to you how much I agree, but most of all, appreciate your remarks about the need to not allow the offender to mistaken kindness for weakness. As an older woman I take on the unintended role that suits the need of the student whether that be mother, grandmother, "old school marm" or "the church lady". Each carries their own conotation. My attempt is to demonstrate authority based on my vast experience and expertise, while concurrently showing that I am not too old or too experienced to walk along side the student with the respectful level of empathy.
As an instructor this has been the challenge that has initiated self-doubt, anger and a lot of time in introspection.
Again thank you for reminding me that I have the right to not allow another to usurp my right to authority.
My confrontational student was not as extreme as yours. Mine disagreed with how I graded her algebra quiz. She had missed a problem because she had not worked it as the directions stated. Although I had given her partial credit she could not let it go. The class went on but every 10 minutes or so she brought it up again. Finally when we took a break, she worked herself up to a point she left. She came back the next class and she never spoke of it again to me. However when students did instructor evaluations I could tell which comments were hers and had to explain them to my director.
The story you wrote about, as you know, is not unique but rather typical. I agree with the lesson that listening is an important element in creating the communication loop. However, after serving in law enforcement for 17 years, there also comes a time when an instructor should not allow or accept disrespect. They are the teacher, the authority, the sole individual who is tasked with keeping order. When a student mistakes kindness for weakness, the position and function of the instructor to protect their students are placed at risk. As much as we want to help as many students as possible, some people refuse to accept the opportunity. Those individuals should not be allowed to stand in the way of students with pure motives and a desire to reach their goals.
