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Have you ever heard the story of the woman who preferred the smell of dead fish to flowers?
 
There is a very old story of a woman who sold fish all her life and knew nothing else. One fine summer day, she was invited to the queen's palace to help prepare a royal festival.  When she was shown to her room, she found it filled with fragrant flowers. "How disgusting," she complained. "Please take me back and let me sleep near my pile of fish."
 
Now why would she choose the stench of her fish over the sweet… >>>

Do you ever feel let down after you reach a goal that you have worked long and hard for? Let's talk about why that happens and how to avoid it.
 
Did you know that people are teleological beings? That means that it is absolutely critical for us to have goals and to know what we want in life. But what happens when we get what we want? When suddenly the goal we have been working so hard to achieve has been accomplished and now there is nothing to strive toward?
 
Well, most of us have a tendency to… >>>

Ever wonder how you can tell if you're living your life in the best possible way? There are some pretty good indicators, so let's explore them today. 

If you're a regular receiver of this email, you have probably read that it's pretty much up to you to create a life that works, that feels right, and that makes you happy. But how in the world can you tell if you're living your life to the fullest? There are some questions you can ask yourself that will help tell you what you need to know.  For example:

• Are you doing what
… >>>

A few days ago, we talked about the possible selfishness of personal growth. Today, let's add another angle to the discussion about whether pursuing personal growth is, indeed, selfish. 
 
In Lou's mind, there was no question about it. Lou believed that we must have a caring relationship with ourselves before we can expect others to do so. But being interested in personal growth doesn't mean you're selfish. Quite the contrary.  
 
In his book, "The Psychology of Romantic Love," Nathaniel Brandon wrote that, "The first affair we must consummate successfully is the love affair with ourselves. Only then are… >>>

How big is your comfort zone? Is it growing or shrinking? All of us live inside an area called a comfort zone. It's the imaginary space containing all the activities we have done often enough to feel comfortable about. It also contains our ideas about where we belong, how we should live, what we do socially, and so on.
 
You can visualize this zone of comfort as a circle, if you like, but the wall of that circle is not really there to protect us. It is made of fear and self-imposed limitations. We like to believe that the… >>>

Are you a talented person? Whether you see yourself that way or not, you need to know that you have at least one natural talent. 
 
It is easy for you to look at a famous musician or artist or dancer and say, "Golly, that person is really talented." But if someone were to ask you whether you, yourself, are talented, you'd be inclined to say, "Well, no, not really." 
 
You see, most of us who don't have brilliant careers in the arts have been trained to see ourselves as lacking in talent. Oh, we may be hard workers,… >>>

Can the mind help cure disease? What role do the emotions play in preventing illness?
 
What is the relationship between the thoughts you think, the feelings you experience, and the overall health and well-being of your body? This is a very old question, but modern science has developed some innovative new ways to determine the answers. And, while what they are finding may startle some people, it doesn't come as a big surprise.
 
It turns out that improving the quality of your life lowers your chances of developing serious mental and physical illness and also improves the speed… >>>

People who would never think of trying to drive a car with the brakes on often do something very similar to themselves.
 
A wise and funny woman once said, "Show me a person without guilt, and I'll show you a person without a mother!" Now, she herself is a mother and guilt, when it's appropriate, is a useful function of a healthy conscience. 
 
The point she was making through humor is that allof us suffer from at least a touch of guilt and feelings of unworthiness. When these feelings grow large enough to take over, it's like trying… >>>

Has anyone ever called you stubborn? Would you describe yourself that way? If so, you may be in luck when it comes to making positive changes.
 
Some people find themselves in trouble a lot because of a personality characteristic that they call stubbornness. You have heard of "will power." Well, stubbornness is a kind of "won't power." It causes you to dig in and refuse to budge, and sometimes it drives other people crazy.
 
But, as Roger and McWilliams pointed out in their book, Life 101, "Just as fear is also excitement, stubbornness is also determination. It's simply… >>>

One of the most important ways we communicate is with language. However, if our language is fuzzy, our communications will be too.
 
If you want to communicate effectively, you'll also want to make your language as effective and clear as it can be. One way to do this is to be very careful about using words we call "universals" or "absolutes" - words like "always," "never," "all" and "every." 
 
Now, universals are fine, when they're true. If you say, "Everyone must die someday," or "All the people in our family have brown eyes," you are talking about facts.… >>>