Hi Patricia,
What a great response! I totally agree with your observation. Most single mothers tend to have a lot of anger built up in them because of the bad choices they made in life, but they must realize they still can be successful. They must work hard to gain success.
Patricia
I have also found that the majority of our angry students right now are single women trying to increase their earning power in order to provide for their children. They come to us with many issues that lead them to feel helpless and out of control. Frustration usually surfaces in the form of anger after their first disappointing result. I like to remind these students that each event in thier lives should be viewed and dealt with seperately in order to avoid a sense of drowning. By focusing on education as empowerment, we can stay in the moment at least while they are in the confines of school.
I elimanate thier audience and the student usually calms down and then speaks and is ready to listen as well
Hi Anis,
What a calm approach you take to the situation. I like the idea of giving the student cold water to cool he/she down.
Patricia
First think and for most, I will take him outside the class room to talk to him, put him in a quit environment.
Give him cold water to cool him down, and start to find out whats was the problem etc...
I try and get the student to calm down, have he/she step out of the classroom and have them express what is going on with them and listen. Offer everything that I am able to offer to them and get it resovled. If it is something that is outside..(personal life) I listen to them and then offer suggestion or opportunity to speak with higher administration.
Hi Shellie,
I understand. This student may need to look into taking anger management classes.
Patricia
Hi Joe,
Once you know you have done your absolute very best then you should be able to rest easy!
Patricia
I know what you mean, sometimes we feel that we should of, would of or could of done more with a student but when it's said and done and it's all over you have to ask yourself......... did you do all that you posibly could have with a student and if after some time doing some honest self evelation the answer is yes I did well then you did your "BEST" good luch Shellie!
I am afraid that this student is going to let it effect her out in the professional field. I suppose I can only do the best for her within my limited capacity. Such as teach her in as patient a way as possible and take her outside to let her vent. I just have to keep it in check so the other students do not feel alientated. They already roll their eyes at her on a very regular basis. Thank you so much for the great advice. I appreciate the input. :)
Yes indeed. I learned that as a manager for a small shop some years ago in dealing with negative customers that I had. however in dealing with them I realized that at times they just needed someone to talk and to vent a bit and that only made for good customer relations too!! I think that practice should apply to students too!!
Hi Tim,
I felt your calm demeanor in your response. You gave an excellent response. I am a firm believer to never let your students attitude cause you to display a bad attitude.
Patricia
Hi Shellie,
I agree! Only deal with what is within your scope.
Patricia
Hi Shellie,
Well, it sounds like administration will not back you. In order for you to keep your job, you are going to have to deal with this as best as you can. Trying having a heart-to-heart conversation with her.
Patricia
The first step when confronted by an angry student, is to take charge of your own emotions. Many students use intimidation to influence your thinking and decisions. Others are simply trying to provoke you and cause you to do something that will be harmfull to you. I (try) to remain calm and listen to the student. Let them vent, get their problems out in the open. Afterwards, try to identify what their main issues are and confirm them with the student. Quite often, just letting the student "blow off steam" is enough to diffues the situation. After tensions have been reduced, I try to find and suggest a possible solution to the student's problems, or at very least acknowledge them.
Hi Bethanne,
What would you do differently the next time when dealing with an angry student?
Patricia
Listening can be effective but it is important not to become the defacto therapist.
Shellie, that is a difficult one to deal with. you don't want to cut her off and seem to unfreindly and uncarring but at the same time you don't want to take up to much of the class time . I'm sure you have already tried talking to her after class to let her know that you are there for her to lend an ear whenever she needs someone to listen and perhaps offer a little advise. What I've also done was to let the class know that you and they have in place an understanding before you begin during class time in that if I see that we are getting away from the subject matter I will let them know usually by saying something to the effect of " GOOD, OK NOW LETS MOVE ON ". this way every one understands ahead of time the procedure you have in place so we won't get side tracked and that it needs to be inforced. this way a student is aware of the rules and it doesn't offened anyone. It usually works good for everyone , even myself when I get a bit long winded to the point when a student has to bring me back to my subject. We all laugh about it and we continue. On the other hand Shellie I once had an Aunt who was negative about everthing in her life and when I asked my mother what's with her she told me that sometimes there are people in life who are just HAPPY BEING UNHAPPY !! it's just her way !
Listening and permitting a venting is usually adequate to diffuse this student but take it outside or to the side so not to disrupt the rest of the class.
I liked all the suggestions that were presented in the reading for this topic. Better to be prepared ahead of time when it comes to dealing with this particular problem. I did have an angry student, took him away from the group to discuss, couldn't resolve between the two of us and had to have a "mediator" to finally assist us to come to a resolution. After reading this lesson, I feel like I have numerous other options to try, as well, some of which may have worked with my experience with this particular student.
